High Crimes
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IMDB rating: 6.10 Plot: High powered lawyer Claire Kubik finds her world turned upside down when her husband, who she thought was Tom Kubik, is arrested and is revealed to be Ron Chapman. Chapman is on trial for a murder of Latin American villagers while he was in the Marines. Claire soon learns that to navigate the military justice system, she’ll need help from the somewhat unconventional Charlie Grimes; meanwhile, Claire’s sister, Jackie, is falling in love with wet-behind-the-ears Lieutenant Embry assigned as the official defense lawyer. And most of the eyewitnesses have rather too conveniently died. |
Actors: Freeman Morgan,Caviezel James,Scott Adam,Davison Bruce,Bower Tom,Hernandez Juan Carlos,Gaston Michael,Ciccolella Jude,Rivera Emilio,Shannon Michael,Billingsley John,Thriller,Drama,Crime,
My dad's being overprotective & controlling?
I’m reposting this because I only had 3 answers last time and none of them were helpful.
Okay, I’m 14 and I’m very mature and responsible for my age. I live in a rather larger city and the crime rate is pretty high, but I do my best to stay away and not get involved in all of that. My parents are divorced and I live with my dad. I haven’t seen my mom in years and I don’t plan on seeing her again. My dad’s a police officer, so he’s pretty strict! Before I go anywhere, he always asks me where I’m going, who I’m going with, and what are we doing. Which I don’t blame him one bit, I mean yeah, sometimes it gets a little annoying.. but he’s just being a good father. Anyways, now that I’m 14 and I’ve been more and more interested in dating (recently I’ve been dating a guy from school), he’s being EXTREMELY overprotective! He put a tracker on my phone, he put cameras in the entertaining room, he took the locks off of all the doors in the house, he reads my diary and ALL my messages in my inbox on my websites/email, and if I’m out then he tracks me down and asks me and my friends 1,000 questions (which is extremely embarrassing and it scares my friends away because they think they’re in trouble). I love my dad and I didn’t mind him before when he just asked me a few questions, but this is ridiculous and it makes me feel like he doesn’t trust me anymore. There’s a fine line between being caring and being controlling.
I get the fact that me growing up probably scares the $hit out of him. What was always his "little girl" is dating now. I try to atleast take a few hours out of my day to spend time with him, which is extremely hard because it seems like he’s always working. How do I convince him to give me a little freedom? It’s not like I want the freedom so I can run wild. I want the freedom so I can feel like I’m responsible and trusted.
My mom is the same way- except I’m not allowed to even date. Both my parents are over protective but my mom is WAY to over protective. Try and tell your dad that you think he doesn’t trust you. Maybe ask him to give you a trust test that you don’t know about or when he will do it. My mom did that and it loosened her up a little. Explain to him how you feel.
Snape's Gal | Feb 01, 2010
heh, sounds like your father needs a hobby, or a girlfriend. There are ways to keep track of your children without being quite so intrusive. However he is a cop. My step dad was a cop and he tailed me occasionally as well, along with accusing me of lying every time he asked me something. A lot of cops cant separate home from work. They see threat everywhere and see the worst in everyone, its just what they’re programed to do, it comes with the job. Tell him exactly what you said here, that you feel like he has no trust in you. And ask him to please try to separate work from his home life. You are not a criminal or on probation. You haven’t broken any rules. He needs to stop acting like you have. He has your best intentions at heart but if he keeps it up bad things happen. The tighter you squeeze a teen the more they slip through your fingers.
s0LuT1oN | Feb 01, 2010
My parents were that way, too. Not the electronic surveillance, but reading my diary, picking up the extension to listen in on my calls, etc. At 19, I left home (probably about 3 years too early, as it curtailed my education) and barely spoke to them. We did not reconcile until I was past 40!
Ask your father to sit down and talk with you.
Tell him this:
"Dad, I really do understand why you are worried about me, but if you don’t loosen the leash just a little bit how can I learn to be responsible for myself? You can’t protect me forever, so please, try to give me just a little freedom, and let me earn each next step."
Then suggest the following:
1–Offer to VOLUNTEER to tell him about your anticipated activities, and to recap your day, conversationally, over dinner, without interrogation.
2–Tell him you will make sure to introduce your friends to him, and then do it.
3–Promise to observe curfews, and to call him if you will be late, and tell him why.
4–Agree to accept the tracker for one year. If you prove yourself trustworthy, he should take off the tracker, and learn to trust that you will continue to keep him informed about your whereabouts.
5–Instead of scrutinizing your e-mail, ask him to instruct you on the best ways to protect yourself from online predators. Promise him that if you get any suspicious e-mails, you will forward them to him.
6–Agree to accept online filters instead of web site tracking. Ask that the filters be modified or lifted at 16.
7–Request that he respect the privacy of your diary, Everyone needs some private place to confide their thoughts. Ask him to let you confide in yourself without scrutiny.
8–If he is worried about what you do when he is working, ask him if there is a friend, neighbor or relative you can check in with while he is at work, so if he does not know where you are, the other person can reassure him.
9–Remind him that privacy is an adult human need, and that you deserve the respect that implies. Ask that you be allowed to lock the bathroom door, and if there is no lock on your bedroom (I never had one!) then ask that he respect you by knocking before he comes in.
10–This is the big one: ask him to consider the possibility that he is over-reacting and not taking your need for privacy and self-responsibility seriously, and that you will equally consider the possibility that you are not taking his concerns about your safety and well-being seriously enough.
Ask that you find a moderator who can shed objective light on this. Ask him to go to a family therapist with you, so you can sort out his fears, your needs and find a safe middle ground where you are both comfortable,. This is not a suggestion for some kind of psychoanalysis (many men resist that), but a family counselor who is trained in mediation. (Use the word "mediation." It is accurate and also a term that, as a police officer, he will relate to.)
Remind him that you are not a criminal, and that you deserve a "presumption of innocence."
By the way–if he scrutinizes your web activity, will he see this?
I hope so.
You might even guide him here, on purpose.
Another Kind of Sam | Feb 01, 2010
Report your dad to Internal Affairs(if the police agency has one), and then Child Protective Services AT ONCE!…
What Dad’s doing is way out of bounds for a cop…if I was in his shoes, I’d be apologizing over and over for "spying" and invasion of your privacy…
Please heed my advice at once…your dad needs some anger management clases, and counseling!
Jacinto | Feb 01, 2010
